WASHINGTON— Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner announced Wednesday a sweeping plan that offers a $5 billion rescue package to the CW Television Network in an effort to salvage the advertiser-friendly, incrreasingly vulnerable female 18-34 demographic.

The action, announced by the Federal Reserve and America’s Next Top Model host Tyra Banks, was taken as Geithner faces growing criticism for not providing the right kinda of leadership at a time when unemployment is rising and the recession is worsening.

President Obama welcomed the news that the government would provide a lifeline to the fledgling fifth-place network.

“I have the utmost faith in Secretary Geithner that a creatively resurgent and profitable CW will increase consumer confidence and boost the Dow Jones closer to the 10,000 mark,” Obama said in his weekly radio address.

Obama called the 112th Congress into an emergency session over the weekend to hear story pitches, deliver notes on scripts, and hold casting sessions.

“Spotted – Serena throwing an intimate Sweet Sixteen party for Jenny,” read Obama from next week’s table draft of Gossip Girl. “And Dan isn’t receiving financial aid at Yale next semester. What’s a Lonely Boy to do?”

“You know you love me. XOXO,” he added.

The Obama administration gave a vote of confidence to the bailout at a press conference on Monday when Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel drew parallels between the great economic challenges ahead of this nation and the drama unfolding on One Tree Hill.

“We do not know what the future holds,” said Emanuel. “But we face the exciting possibility of dreams come true and the heartbreaking reality that being an adult isn’t as easy as it seems.”

Meanwhile, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pushed for sweeping storyline reforms across the Tuesday and Thursday night lineups.

“It is in our nation’s best interests that Luke Perry reprises his role as Dylan McKay on 90210 before the wedge separating Brenda and Kelly becomes insurmountable,” said Pelosi.

Reid added that Lex Luthor’s absence on Smallville this season opens the door for some exciting stunt casting. Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman and Massachusetts Representative Barney Frank have reportedly inked to play villains later this season.

The step marks the beginning of a dramatic turnaround for the CW Network, which just last season was bleeding viewers and rumored to be on the chopping block. But its success in establishing a base of young female viewers and a clear brand identity led the Fed to take an active interest.